Is it because he doesn't have a uterus?

I have now been back at work for 2 months - my loving husband is the stay at home parent and is doing a good job taking care of the children.

I am frustrated however because when I was pregnant with Adrianna and we discussed this arrangement he said that I would be surprised with his domestic duties. This is the same man I have been married to for 8 years now and I don't think he possesses a domestic bone in his body. At any rate I was on maternity leave for 4 months and pretty much took care of the house as I had been doing with working and having 1 child, I didn't say anything becasue I was on leave and not working and it just seemed natural. During my time off I would tell Joe that this was his opportunity for OJT (on the job training) and the perfect time to get himself into a routine since I was home to help. He did not take advantage of this time so a month before I was to return to work I started saying that I would be happy to make a chore chart so that we could each have our specific duties and a day when they needed to be completed by, I thought it would also help to keep from one person getting frustrated with the other as long as our duties were being done,
he agreed to the chore chart -

We made the chore chart here is the run down:

HOPE'S WEEKLY CHORES:

• Laundry (1 or 2 loads each weekday night, including folding and put away)
• Change bedding on all beds - (every other weekend)
• Vaccuum and dust our bedroom -(Monday night)
• Swiffer and dust Quentin's bedroom -(Monday night)
• Vaccuum upstairs hallway -(Monday night)
• Vaccuum and dust downstairs -(Tuesday night)

This list does not include bathing the children each night and putting them to bed along with making dinner, cleaning the kitchen and packing lunches for the next day or grocery shopping and menu planning .

JOE'S WEEKLY CHORES:

• Clean Upstairs Bathroom - Full bathroom to be completed by Thursday
• Clean downstairs bathroom - 1/2 barh to be completed by Thursday
• Mop the kitchen floor -(Wednesday)
• Mop entryway floor - (Wednesday)
• Pick up Quentin from School - Tuesday - Thursday
• Take Quentin to speech - Monday and Wednesday

The only other thing that I have asked him to take care of is to pick up after himself (not an unreasonable request) during the day - ok more specifically put your breakfast/lunch dishes in the dishwasher, put the bottles that you have fed Adrianna with on the sink (so I can wash them at night).

I was a stay at home parent when Quentin was a baby until he was 19 months old. I was able to do everything - the only thing I asked him to do was an occasional Costco run because I hate Costco.

When I get home on any given day - I can tell exactly where in the house that Joe and Adrianna have been - as there is a bottle or blanket or jammies or some kind of evidence left in the area. The kitchen is a nightmare the counters have food or crumbs on them from where he did not wipe it down after he ate breakfast or lunch or snack - his dishes are in the sink not in the dishwasher the list goes on. I get dinner started and then my load of laundry and then go through and pick up after him from the day - the picking up takes all of about 10 minutes so I don't understand why it isn't done before I get home.

It is so frustrating because I am feeling that it is not fair for me to be at work all day long and then to come home to a mess that I have to pick up along with making time for my children who I have been away from all day and God forbid sit down and have a moment to myself for half a second before it is time to go to bed or move onto the next chore. I have also taken on the responsiblity of cleaning the bathrooms because they have yet to be done by Joe since I have been back at work.

I guess it is one of those things that I am choosing not to address and will just complain to myself (or my blog) about. I think that once we get a couple credit cards paid off I am going to arrange for a house keeper - we had one before Quentin was born and I LOVED IT!!!! The only thing that they don't do is the laundry which I am totally fine with that.

Until I get my housekeeper back the only sensible reason I can think of that he is unable to do chores and take care of the children at the same time is because he does not have a uterus.

Thank you for letting me vent!

My Kids

I am so thankful that my husband and I are able to have one parent stay home with the children. My husband has taken to his duties as a stay at home parent very well, he still needs work in the domestic duties however I will not complain as I am so grateful that we don't have to pay child care!

Yesterday was a typical Monday for me, I got up and came to work my family were all snoozing away. It actually was fine because Quentin was not feeling well all weekend so sleeping in was a good thing!

I got home after work and Quentin was very excited to show me he had picked out his own outfit and dressed himself. This is a BIG deal because he has a hard time getting dressed due to his dwarfism, we have been working with him and tell him to try and after he tries and he needs help them we help him. Although like any 4 year old he never wants anyone to help him, so he gets frustrated when he can't pull his clothes on - So this is what his outfit consisted of - Underware and rain boots!

I seriously could not stop laughing when I got home last night! I have to hand it to the kid, he picked the easiest items to put on and then check out the pose...what a character!

My daughter was crashed out in her high chair and looked so sweet that I had to take her picture too!

I wish that I could just sit at the table and fall asleep and be left alone!!

I hope that everyone had a good Monday!!!

An eventful weekend....

We celebrated our Anniversary this past weekend. The acutal day was last weekend however our babysitter, my mom, was out of town so we celebrated on Saturday with lunch and a movie. We dropped off the kids around 11:30 AM and once everyone was settled we were off to lunch at Applebees, we had a nice lunch and conversation, we realized it was the first time since Adrianna was born that we had been anywhere just the two of us. After lunch we decided to catch a movie, I wanted to see Gran Torino but Joe wanted to see Madea goes to Jail I really had no desire to see this movie but gave in and have to admit it was pretty funny, and apparently did very well this weekend.

After the movie we went to pick up the children, when we got to my mom's house she said that Quentin felt warm and had been sneezing and runny nose, my first thought was great another cold. It was around dinner time and mom said that she had been thinking about a Big Mac all day, I told her I would get her one since I needed to go to Carrs to get some medicine for Quentin.

I get the meds at Carrs and drive across the street to McDonald's the drive thru line was way too long so I decided to go in, I order the food and off I go. When exiting the parking lot I noticed something was sticking out of the snowbank, I looked it was a gun, yes I said a gun. I had to do a double no make that a triple take to realize what I was seeing. I called my mom and asked her what I should do, she suggested calling and speaking with the manager at McDonald's. OK I call the McDonald's and a teenager answers the phone, I told her what I saw and she sounded annoyed and just said "UM OK" not feeling confident that the nit wit would investigate the situation I decided to call the non-emergency line for APD. I gave the dispatcher the information, any other time that I have called (which is not a lot) the non-emergency line I have never received a call back, although I have never called for a weapon related matter. At any rate 45 minutes later my cell phone rings, the caller id said PRIVATE CALL, I answered. The voice on the phone said "May I speak to Hope Chavez?" I idenified myself, he then said, "This is Officer Fishback, I understand you found a weapon at McDonalds?" I gave him all the information and he told me to hold the line, he was arriving at McDonalds I told him which snow bank I saw the gun in. I told him that I was hoping it was a fake gun - he then said "no this is real" HOLY COW - a real gun this is what ran through my mind. SO then Officer Fishback asked for my drivers license number, address, phone number and date of birth. He told me that someone would contact me if they needed more information.

I am so glad that I called the police, who knew you could get a burger, fries and handgun at McDonalds? I know not funny but it made for an eventful weekend!

Good deed for Friday....

I stopped by Starbucks on my way to work this morning and got a venti apple chai infusion and a scrumptious cranberry orange scone. While I was waiting in the drive thru line a Police officer pulled up behind me, when I got to the window the lovely barista working the window tells me my total is $5.40, I asked if I could pay for the police officer's coffee behind me, she said sure! Then she smiled and said that he also ordered a sandwich was that ok, of course.

My good deed for the day! As I drove off I smiled to myself and hoped that my good deed would help the officer have a great day!!

I have warm fuzzy feelings from my morning! It is amazing that my day started out with my favorite drink and a good deed! Karma what goes around comes around I am a firm believer in that!!

Have a good weekend!!!

Adult to-do list

I have finally completed my last will and testament. It was a very strange feeling to be putting this together. I know I have needed to do this for awhile now but kept putting it off. For some reason with two children now I felt that it was something I needed to get handled. I have been crossing a lot of my "adult to-do" list. I updated my life insurance policy to include both of my children as beneficiaries, made an appointment to get Adrianna a life insurance policy.
Filed our 2008 taxes, filed our 2008 applications for the Permanent Fund (they pay us to live in Alaska). Paid bills, met with the mortgage broker to get pre-qualified to buy a real house (we own a condo now), set up an appointment with my financial planner to make adjustments to my investments for my retirement account.

Gosh this week has just been full of all adult things.

Maybe this weekend I will take Quentin sledding so that I can feel like less than an adult or better yet maybe I will go to IHOP at lunch and order chocolate chip pancakes and a BIG glass of Milk!!!!

February 13, 2001

Eight years ago today I woke up in Hawaii on my wedding day!!! Those that know the background know that this was an especially Special day. Like any bride I had the normal jitters, I had my mom with me and my friend Kathryn who lives in Hawaii helped out with the preperation for our day!

The morning started with breakfast in the hotel room - Joe, his sister and best man were getting ready somewhere else. Mom and I got our hair done at the salon in the hotel and then it was back to the room to get dressed, we only had 30 minutes before the Limo picked us all up to take us to the location where we would exchange our vows.

Once back in the room I did my makeup while mom got dressed, it was muggy that morning so we had the curtains and deck door open to get some air moving through the room. Mom was dressed and I finished putting on my face - it was time to get into my dress! By this time Joe's sister had come down and was taking pictures of me getting ready - what fun! So without divulging too much info there I was standing in my underware, bra, and panty hose - I am facing the window getting ready to pour into my dress and notice that on the deck at the hotel across from ours is an old man with binoculors totally watching us get dressed - I totally started laughing and finished getting dressed. Once everything was in place - I looked outside again and now the old man is clapping and giving me the thumbs up - I guess he approved!!

In the elevator on the way down to the lobby to see my groom for the first time, I totally lost it, it had been a very emotional time leading up to this day, at that moment I guess everything hit me that this was FINALLY REALLY happening! The elevator door opened and I walked out into the lobby, the other guests at the hotel clapped it made me feel really good and embarrassed at the same time that all these people were looking at me!!!!

When I saw Joe he looked very handsome standing in his black suit and sunglasses - he just smiled and looked at me the sameway he did the night we met! He was sitting with our witness, Matt - who looked like a semi had run him over, wrinkled shirt, van tennis shoes with his slacks and to this day I still am not sure that he combed his hair that morning - I really didn't notice until I was looking at pictures.

Into the Limo and off the wedding site, we arrived and Roger our wedding planner was at waiting with the officiant. It was sprinkling a little bit which bummed me out, my friend Kathryn was also at the park waiting for us, she had arranged for our flowers - a beautiful purple orchid lei for Joe and myself as well as a crown of tropical flowers for me, I didn't have a veil.

Kathryn assured me that in Hawaii when it rains on your wedding day - it is considered a blessing. After the first photo was taken, it stopped raining and the sun came out!! After a few pictures it was time to start the ceremony.

We exchanged our vows with the ocean waves crashing to our back, it really was beautiful and perfect! The minister had asked that we all bow our heads for the final prayer, (keep in mind we were at a public park) all of a sudden during our prayer - I hear Joe and Matt giggling I open my eyes - a bum had totally pushed his way through my ceremony and was getting a drink of water, of all the areas in this huge park he had to choose the water spicket where I was getting married. I couldn't help it and totally started laughing.
At 11:15 AM we were officially pronounced Mr. and Mrs. Joe Chavez!!!!!!

After a few more pictures it was time for the luncheon - we only had 6 people so we did not need a huge reception. It was off to the Sheraton where my mom had arranged a beautiful private room for our luncheon. Again entering the lobby there were cheers and clapping, I felt like a rock star! We had a wonderful lunch and were surprised because mom and Kathryn had arranged for a cake and champange.

After the luncheon Joe and walked back to our hotel, that was only a couple blocks away. Walking hand in hand down the street - people were honking and waving it was really a great feeling!

Although it wasn't the traditional church wedding and reception that had previously been planned, we only had 6 guests, I couldn't have asked for anything more. Everything was beautiful and perfect. I can't believe that 8 years have passed already - we have grown together as a couple and have two beautiful children! I look forward to many more years with Joe!

Happy Anniversary, I love you!

Breaking up is hard to do.....

SO I have been with my hair lady, Rhonda for almost 10 years now. During my pregnancy when I am most picky - I had asked for a new style, I have short hair so I know that limits it a little bit, Rhonda's answer is always the same ok we can do something different and then cuts it EXACTLY the same.
The last 6 months each time I went in for a cut I would look through the magazines and choose a new style only to be told "oh your hair wont look good that way" disappointed I would pay my $45 plus tip and walk out unhappy.

My mom also used Rhonda as her stylist, well in December she had a HUGE, I mean HUGE break in her hair, when she asked Rhonda about it was told that it was because her hair was dry from the weather. I mean seriously this was not correct, my mom had a hole in the back of her hair where it broke off.

So enough was enough, I found a new stylist Kilika - I visited her on Saturday and LOVE HER!!! She totally listened to me and gave me an updated look - I booked my next appointment for 6 weeks for color and cut. I am so happy I just feel sassy and sexy!!!
For the first time in months I didn't feel disappointed walking out of the salon or that I had just wasted my money.

My mom also visited Kilika on Saturday - it turns out that she had COMPLETE chemical damage to her hair and brakage all over - Kilika totally fixed her hair and she looks FABULOUS. I have not seen my mom's hair look this good in a very long time. My mom already has a plan on how she is going to break up with Rhonda - I wish she would break up for me too!

How do I break up with someone who I have been seeing for 10 years, I know I wasn't dating her but a hair dresser is like a therapist - it will be sad to break up with her. I guess I just need to put my big girl panties on and call Rhonda and tell I have found someone else.

One Word...

It's harder than you think!! This was a fun little quiz that I got on email through a forward - thought I would post it!


Where is your cell phone?......desk
Your hair ..........Short
Your father? ........Jerk
Your favorite thing? ...........kids
Your dream last night?..... ?
Your favorite drink? .......... Margarita
Your dream/goal? ..........
The room you are in? .....Office
Your fear? .........snakes
Where do you want to be in 6 years?.....rich
Muffins? ............blueberry!
One of your wish list items?.......
Where you grew up? .......Anchorage
The last thing you did? ......filed
What are you wearing?......clothes
Your TV?..........home
Your pets? ..........none
Your computer? .....Dell
Your life? .........Good
Your mood? ........calm
Missing someone? .......yes
Your car? ....black
Favorite store?.....Target
Your summer? .....rainy
Your favorite color? .......purple
When is the last time you laughed? .....today
Last time you cried? .......?

Talk, Talk, Talk...

Anyone who knows me can agree that I have been giving the gift of gab. I believe that my daughter has also been gifted this!

She has for the most part slept 6-7 hours or more at night since she was 6 weeks old, very lucky considering that my son did not sleep through the night until well after age 2.

This week she has been waking me up not with crying or wanting to be changed or fed, she is totally talking in her sleep, my mom said that she walked and talked in her sleep when she was a kid, although she doesn't know if she started in the crib.

This morning I thought for sure that I would walk over to Adrianna's crib and find her sitting there with a cup of coffee - she was very chatty and laughing. I wonder who she is talking to?

When my son was almost 1 my grandmother passed away - we were very close and because she had dementia she never really met my son. Although when we took him to the Nursing home to visit she would light up, like she knew that he was her baby too! After she passed my son would have times that he would be laughing in his sleep like a full belly laugh - almost like someone was tickling him. I have always thought my grandmother was his guardian angel!

Now that Adrianna is doing the samething I am sure that my grandmother is watching over my kids and probably playing with them too!

Friends

As I was rejoicing in the birth of my friend Kate's new baby boy, I realized that I have GREAT friends. As these were happy thoughts I did get a little sad as I realized too that all my very close friends live in different states. One of the HUGE drawbacks of living in Alaska.

So where do I begin, when I went to college I was told that I would meet people who would become my friends for life. I really didn't think that was true as I already had friends from high school that I was sure would be in my life forever. My freshman year at St. Martin's was a little rough from homesickness, and I did meet some good friends - who I have actually found or they have found me on Facebook. It wasn't until my sophomore year that I met the people that I am so blessed to have in my life.

I remember like it was yesterday the first day I met Amy Z, she was my neighbor in Baran Hall she was moving into her room with the help of her sister. I introduced myself and literally have talked to Amy everyday since the first day we met, she is my chosen sister! There were many weekend days when the gang (Amy, Amy, Sandra, Kate, Antionette and sometimes the boys) would gather in mostly my room and order pizza to cure our ok my hangovers. When I think back to all the fun that we had - I am amazed that we all managed to grow up through the process of being normal college kids and we all have normal lives.

I do miss my friends from St. Martin's but am blessed that when I go to Washington or they come to Alaska it is like we have not been apart. Yes we all have our own lives with new families but I will continue to be thankful that I have these people in my life. I do know that they are only a phone call or an email away! I LOVE YOU GUYS!

My other friend that I has moved away from me is Brenda - she is my newest BFF. We met while working at RBMS, Bren's cubicle was behind mine and we both did data entry. It too much like Amy was an instant friendship. I have many favorite memories of Bren is at the company Christmas party - we had been to have our hair done and to see the musical Grease, we got to the Christmas party and started drinking on empty stomachs needless to say we were a little tipsy - Brenda was doing cheers from her cheerleading days for the President and Vice President of the company. I still have to laugh everytime I think of that party! The drive home was pretty funny too - our husbands were in the front seat and Brenda and I were in the back just giggling and having fun!

Brenda and I discovered the joys of scrapbooking together - I really miss my scrapping buddy! Our boys Quentin and Kyle are 6 months apart - I don't think anything bonds friends more than becoming moms!

My BFF now lives in Florida (damn military) I think that there have been only a few days where we have not talked via text, email or phone since we met.

I have a handful of people in my life that I consider friends. I can't say how blessed I am to have these people in my life! They are more than friends I consider them my family!

Thank you! Love you guys!!

Who knew...

Saturday was a great day! The kids and I picked up my mom and headed for a morning of shopping and then to lunch. Our first stop was Starbucks, I ordered my new favorite drink Apple Chai Infusion, thank you Kate, Quentin and my mom ordered Passion Tea Lemonaides and Adrianna was asleep and at 4 1/2 months has not discovered how GREAT Starbucks is! Once we all had our drinks it was time to make way to Target - we only have one in Anchorage and it is across town but always worth the drive.

I bought only necessary items at Target which is a little disappointing but was proud that I stuck to my list and within budget! My mom however complained as we were leaving that she did not stick to her list. She bought Quentin the cutest rain boots, Lightening McQueen.

After spending an hour in Target it was time for lunch my mom let Quentin choose he decided on our favorite mexican restaurant La Cabana which is always so YUMMY!
While we were eating my aunt called and told me about a fantastic sale at JcPenny - so after lunch mom and I dropped the kids at home with my husband and my mom and I were off to JcPenny. I found AWESOME deals, I purchased 2 pairs of work pants and 3 shirts for work all for a total of $73.65 I had a gift card so my out of pocket was only $43.00 WOW you can't beat that!!!

I took mom home after JcPenny's and stopped at the gas station. I filled my car with gas and ran inside to get a beverage. As I was strolling down the aisle toward the refrigerator case, I saw that they had Stadium Style brats - remembering that I had been out playing all day and did not take anything out for dinner I thought that sound good. I bought a package of Brats, hot dog buns, a bag of chips and 3 homemade snickerdoodle cookies, my total was $12 WHO KNEW YOU COULD BUY DINNER AND DESSERT FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY AT THE GAS STATION!!!!
I must say that the brats were so good I wish I had bought two packages.